The Meaning of Life and Nigerian Prices

Dear Tyler Tremblay,

I am Alex Yeung, an attorney in KL Malaysia. I found your contact over the internet and it gave me a great joy, that you are the one I strongly believe could assist me achieve my long time dream. Being more positive that with your compliance/consent we could cooperate to retrieve the (18,000,000.00 USD) left by my deceased client in his account here in Malaysia before his demise in 2008, since your last name’s are the same.

I shall procure legal papers to support your stand as claimant. But an honest cooperation is highly needed from your part. However, if this goes against your moral ethics, kindly accept my sincere apology. But If on the contrary you wish to achieve this with me then, respond with interest for further details.

Lastly, I shall inform you upon your response the percentage by which we shall split the proceeds.

Regards,

Mr. Alex Yeung

Alex,

So good to hear from you. I do look forward to working with you on
retrieving your client’s $18 Millions USD, but I have something much
more pressing for you:

First: I’ve discovered the meaning of everything.

I asked myself some unnerving questions and came to some equally disturbing conclusions. What’s the point? Why even bother? Life sucks, I’ll die eventually and everything will be rotting, dying, useless, forgotten. Nothing will happen afterward; there are no great rewards awaiting. Working your whole life only to retire at 65 and have 5 years to travel the world at a snails pace before Alzheimer kicks in doesn’t exactly sound like something I’m interested in.

I pressed on working, living, drinking, occasionally forgetting that
it’s all meaningless. No one knew that I obsessed over the meaninglessness
of it all. It’s impossible to know this about me, I love laughing and playing games,
partying, and heck I even like working. I love my girlfriend fiancé and her
smile. I love making her happy more than anything.

How can I possibly reconcile the fact that it’s all meaningless when
meaning penetrates my being every single day?

Ready for this, Alex?

The meaning of life is that there is none. No one can tell you what it
means but yourself. Find meaning in work, find it in love. Be nice as
much as possible. Make things for now, make things for the future. Do
it all while staring into the face of the meaningless. Accept the
meaningless proudly; not everyone is so brave.

Second: I am a Nigerian Prince in need of escaping the country with over
$45 Million USD. Having consulted with my colleagues and based on the
information gathered from the Nigerian Chambers Of Commerce And
Industry, I have the privilege to request your assistance to transfer
the sum of $45,000,000 (forty five million, United States dollars)
into your account.

We are now ready to transfer the fund overseas and that is where you
come in. It is important to inform you that as civil servants, we are
forbidden to operate a foreign account; that is why we require your
assistance. The total sum will be shared as follows: 70% for us, 25%
for you and 5% for local and international expenses incidental to the
transfer.

In order to complete these transactions we must become Facebook friends. After which, we will then need to poke each other no less than three (3) times for you to gain my trust.

I look forward to our future business transactions.

Thank you,

Tyler

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